If you know anything about Marco you know that this is not a man with an affinity for Jolly St. Nic. (Unless it's he's the Dutch variety complete with stick for beating naughty children and a black slave under strict orders to kidnap said bad little ones off to Turkey in burlap bags.) When we walk past a stuffed Mr. and Mrs. Clause, Marco always makes sure to say to our tots, "What a nice generic grandma and grandpa set of dolls."
Part of me wants to be honest and tell Zina that there is only national debt and no Santa what so ever. Part of me wants to be able to bribe my children into doing my bidding by threatening them with "Santa is Watching" every time they start snipping my fine furniture to bits with kid-scissors. Part of me wants them to just be kids for a while and enjoy mystery.
Now what do I do?
Leave lots of advise ...
11 comments:
I've wondered how to handle the whole Santa thing myself, so I'm excited to read the comments you get. My parents always dodged the question with answers like, "The spirit of Christmas is real and brings joy to the world at Christmastime," leaving me pretty sure Santa wasn't real yet still not convinced enough to throw caution to the wind.
i wrote about this exact thing last year - dec. 14 (dilemna) & 16 (conclusion) 2007.
i say let kids be kids. let them see the world as kind and jolly -- there is plenty of time to be jaded later.
We told Jack that we were not at liberty to say whenever he asked if Santa Claus was real.
At about age 8 Madeleine suspected something was amiss--but begged us NOT to tell her yay or nay. She wanted to have complete control over the bursting of that bubble, and that was not the time.
But you know what our mother STILL says: He's real! Believe!
Ish is getting smart too. Yesterday we passed a "Santa" on the side of a busy street holding a huge sign that read:"50% off bedroom furniture, this weekend only!" He asked if it was the real deal, what was I to tell him? I said Santa was really busy this time of year and he sometimes asked ordinary people to dress up and run a few errands for him. Let them enjoy the magic for now, coz they will figure out life sucks sooner or later.
I still believe.
We've never had a santa issue...santa is anyone who doesn't want to be identified while doing something for someone else. So, as our kids got older we let them "santa" as well. They fill our stockings we fill theirs. They decide what to do for someone in secret and we have a great time being secretive and lots of giving.
Caution: I had a friend that decided there must not be a God either if santa wasn't real...even into her adulthood she was traumatized.
Good luck!
Denise
That last comment illustrates why Dad hates Santa so much. If you lie to them about Santa, why are they supposed to still believe you about Jesus? I was about Zina's age when I figured it out... I asked my mom if Santa was real, and she asked me, "Well, what do you think?" And I told her, "I think he's not real." She said, "Well, you're right." So then, I asked, "...and, the Tooth Fairy's not real either, huh?" She nodded. "...and the Easter Bunny, too, huh." She nodded again. I was disappointed but at the same time, I felt smarter than kids my age. I tried telling Liz he wasn't real, but I don't think she believed me. Later on she stopped believing in Santa but still believed in Sinter Klaas.
Annie (my youngest at 9) noticed a couple of months ago that I had mentioned buying a particular item that she found in her STOCKING last Christmas. She finally put two-and-two together. I feel TERRIFIC to be free of that burden forever.
I never lied to them, but as soon as they asked I was happy to let them in on the secret.
One thing we did to try to give the kids a clue was dress Dan up as Santa for some Christmas parties. I think that helped ease the transition in their minds..."Oh! That's Dad!"
Now just try getting Marco into a Santa suit! We've got one here waiting for him if you need it.
I was always a little uncomfortable with C.S. Lewis' inclusion of Father Christmas in the Narnia stories. Same problem about religious faith and holiday faith. I find annoying the decorative wall signs that say "Just Believe", but then I have to remember that believing is one of Christ's injunctions to us. Why? What do we gain by believing? How careful do we have to be about the absolute veracity of what we believe in...is it even possible to be 100% sure? If we wait until we are sure something is true have we missed the boat? Is there some value in simply "being believing" as Christ asks us to be?
Good luck!
Lisa
Hey, I'm not as much a scrooge as this all sounds. I've never said "There's no Such Thing as Santa," and I willingly take a bite out of the Christmas cookies on the hearth and fill the stockings. But I will admit I've never actively try to sell Santa to my kids.
My number one Christmas Pet Peeve is when at the ward party they have Santa appear at the manger holding baby Jesus and reading the Christmas story. That way too much mixes up the myths... and sets kids up for the betrayal of faith that Denise mentions.
The Dutch Sinterklas is less trouble because he's absurd and not connected with Christmas, since he comes and goes at the beginning of December, leaving Christmas alone.
By the way, Andi saved me this year from utter metaphysical angst when the ward activity chairman asked her to get me to be Santa for the ward party. Andi kindly declined, and instead took over the whole project. So instead of Santa and reindeer on the manger rooftop, Andi's currently recreating a bustling Bethlehem street market in our church cultural hall, complete with publicans, beggars, vendors, money changers and Roman troublemakers, so that our ward Christmas party this year will be Santa-free. See how lucky I am to be married to her?
I am totally making a mental note of Andi's Santa-free Bethlehem street Christmas party. I have no idea where I stand on the Santa issue - no kids in our tribe yet - but I LOVE the Bethlehem street idea!
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